BeyondNoblesse

pathfuckery:

jumpingjacktrash:

copperbadge:

akielosrises:

crazymuff1n:

writing-prompt-s:

At long last, The Chosen One has been discovered. Working as a cashier. With no interest in doing anything even slightly more difficult.

yeah because there is nothing more difficult than retail

tbh anyone who works/has worked retail would see the chance to go around saving the world in ways that could potentially kill them as a welcome vacation

“Does the position of Chosen One offer health benefits of any kind?” 

“Well, our ragtag gang of world-saving underdogs has a doctor on-team.”

“Do I have to pay her out of pocket, is what I’m asking.”

“Gosh no! She’s an idealist, you don’t pay her at all!”

“Oh! That’s nice. But then I guess there’s no paycheck.”

“I mean, the secret cabal that dispenses our orders does make sure we have enough money to feed ourselves and keep a roof over our secret lair and such.”

“Hourly?”

“Hourly what?”

“Like have you guys ever had to punch a time clock?”

“We once had to dismantle a sinister time-freezing device in the shape of a clock….otherwise no.”

“Sold. Off we go.” 

“do i have to be nice to people who are yelling at me?”

“we’re the good guys, you can’t kill random civilians just because they’re mean!”

“kill?? no, i mean, can i tell them off.”

“well, sure, of course.”

*rips name tag off shirt and tosses it over shoulder* “i’m your huckleberry.”

This resonates on a spiritual level

(via thatyellowfinch)

captainsnoop:

shinzo-abe-official:

captainsnoop:

captainsnoop:

i went in to a cells at work thread on 4chan’s /a/ because i can’t help but immerse myself in sludge and the whole thread was anons talking about how they’ve been eating better and drinking more water because they want the anime girls that live inside of them to be happier 

shinzo abe you son of a bitch, you did it. 

cells at work is an anime about anthropomorphic cells living in a human body, depicted as a large city 

otaku on 4chan watched the show and, in a desire to make the cells in their bodies happy, have started to live healthier lives 

shinzo abe, the prime minister of japan and noted son of a bitch, actually managed to get anime viewers to start taking care of themselves through anime 

Mission accomplished, now fuck already.

baby steps, mister prime minister. 

(via matchbox-chariot)

jawnwats:

prismatic-bell:

cj-amused:

tenoko1:

evildorito:

onewordtest:

trikruwriter:

“This is your daily, friendly reminder to use commas instead of periods during the dialogue of your story,” she said with a smile.

“Unless you are following the dialogue with an action and not a dialogue tag.” He took a deep breath and sat back down after making the clarifying statement. 

“However,” she added, shifting in her seat, “it’s appropriate to use a comma if there’s action in the middle of a sentence.”

“True.” She glanced at the others. “You can also end with a period if you include an action between two separate statements.”

Things I didn’t know

“And–” she waved a pen as though to underline her statement–“if you’re interrupting a sentence with an action, you need to type two hyphens to make an en-dash.”

You guys have no idea how many students in my advanced fiction workshop didn’t know any of this when writing their stories.

(via weescottishcrowley)

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

ego-ann-16:

ego-ann-16:

I thought of the phrase “that really rustles my jimmies” and burst out laughing

Fuckin… Why did this get notes? Its neither tagged nor does it make sense

it just really rustles our jimmies

(via aquatichart)